Hello there, Kettle
My name is ***
You’re blackened metal
And I am not

You are used for water-boiling
And I am used to cook
You are such a soiled thing
But I have such a look!

You find yourself, I am sure,
An object of ridicule
And I am found all the more
As absolutely critical

Do not pretend to be so true
As to walk the path that I’ve got
Do not pretend that I am like you
I assure you that you are not

You must endear to be like me
Old Kettle, I’m helping you out
You could change if you’d only see
You’re the one that sticks yourself out!

So go away, dumb Kettle,
Go away you silly old fool
Do not ******* and settle
You down ‘til you know the rules:

If you feel, do not speak
Not to me, at least
But if your hunger will not leave
Perhaps you need a priest

Or someone else who can deal with this
And the problems I’ve outlined, as well
Because I don’t want to deal with your *******
Just get some mother-******* help

I am the ***
You are the kettle
I am not like you
I am not like you