I am quite disappointed in myself
For the things I've done,
The relapses I've enacted,
In the past few weeks.
While the blade brings blood
She brings heart,
One bears visible scars
The latter hides them in shame,
While my scars will heal in time
The memories barely fade.
Just when things were getting better
One night ruined it all;
I couldn't control my desire,
My crave,
For the one who seems to never leave.
So with one conversation,
A few twists of words,
I unleashed a million demons.
Now I don't know whether to regret
Or to celebrate;
Can't tell if she spoke only in the moment
Or in truth from her heart.
So I guess I'll find out in the end
If all drugs lead to death.