That's it, I'm throwing my hat
Into the ring
At the voters behest I'll be the next best
Well...you know the thing

I'll spin on the spot
If the questions they've got
Are way too deep
I'll hem and I'll haw
Hack and I'll cough
Then ask the crowd
What do you mean

So that I do not lose
I'll promise the moon
Then when asked about it
Act like I don't have a clue

And if I have to
I'll jump through some hoops
Crack smiles at the crowd
Never once telling the truth

I'll promise less taxes
To please all the masses
And for that serious look
I'll make sure to wear glasses

I'll kiss ugly babies
Shake a few hands
Tell them all maybe
Hint at some plans

In the scheme of things
I'll make sure they're all grand
As they throw me their votes
Because I am the....

Well...you know the thing