sometimes when i'm reminded of you
i think of how we were together
and the anger blinds me
i had so much more to say
than the diminished words i spoke
i thought i loved you
but i've realized
that our love was never really love
it was too dangerous and impure
your way with words was so devastating
but somehow you gained my trust
learned my secrets
and used them against me
my intoxication
brought down by your charm
i admit
every time you called it quits
i crashed and burned
but i learned
you were just an empty threat
bent to keep me in line
controlled
distilled to your liking
but i poured my heart into the brew
and it remained strong
you hated that about me
how willful i was
how stubborn
you made sure to stomp it out
like fire
but i kept those embers hot
and when i regained my dignity
i let it burn
through our forest
your controlling stare may have marred me then
but i've moved on without you
free to speak my mind
and not just a selection
free to choose my clothes, my friends, my family
i took back what you stole
and now i stand with them
tall and proud of who i am
strong, independent and stubborn
those things do not make me flawed
they make me someone worthy of **respect