Jul 2020
when i look at you
it fills the despondent void
of what i didn't have
when i look at you
it fills space to love harder
needed from the past
when i look at you
i am full of happiness
no longer helpless
when i look at you
there's a kid celebrating
those victories fought
he is a spirit
who goes to rest knowingly
that you avenged him
it fills the despondent void
of what i didn't have
when i look at you
it fills space to love harder
needed from the past
when i look at you
i am full of happiness
no longer helpless
when i look at you
there's a kid celebrating
those victories fought
he is a spirit
who goes to rest knowingly
that you avenged him
Tried haiku like poems. definitely was a battle. I'm referencing my ability to smile. I often obsess over pictures of myself being happy and I've realized it's because there has never been a chance in my childhood to be myself, authentically and unapologetically. When I embrace my happiness, it's to fill the voids of unacceptance, and never feeling adequate as a kid. I recognize both behaviors, but as I grow closer to adulthood, it's something to think about.
(21/Gender Nonconforming/the moon)
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