As I enter I am conscious
Of the dangers and effects
Even though it is alluring
I’ll regret in retrospect
But my mind just keeps persisting
This time too it’ll have its way
Even though I’m well acquainted
With the things it will display
And it’s just like at the movies
I am ready and all set
Soon my mind will start projecting
All the things I must forget
And I sit there while reliving
Awful things that made me sad
All the while infatuated
By the impact they once had
Though petrified I keep on viewing
Now and then I make a sound
I now see to my confusion
That these visuals still haunt
But the courage still eludes me
To get up and leave this space
And the horrors I’m enduring
Can be seen upon my face
As I slowly am regaining
The awareness that I lost
I agree my mind has tricked me
To forget what it would cost
So again I start the struggle
To escape the void I’m in
With a temporary promise
Not to enter here again.
Wendy Nipas