I've become such a people pleaser. I'll do anything to make people that I love not leave me. Everyone leaves me. Isn't that funny?
And as I please and I please, little bites of me are taken. With ever slice into my flesh I finally become useful, like they said I could be. Isn't this hysterical?
After so many years of keeping quiet. So many times being told that you're looking for attention, because you're "just not that interesting". After no one hearing you, you just stopped taking all together. Are you laughing yet?
There are things I thought I had locked away, I thought could never get through the walls of my heart. These memories bombard their way up my throat and straight to my eyes. Now it's all I see. All I hear. All I feel. Those hands and heavy breathing. The creek of the wooden stairs. How cold my skin went. How I would just lay there and stay silent. It's just ******* hilarious?
It's so hilarious I forgot to laugh.
I'm annngry and sad and also just ******* numb and done with existence.