Who are they to you?
Mere friends,
like me?
Objects of potential interest?
That you found so suddenly.
My fingers ache in the morning,
When we used to talk in soliloquies.

Now I'm not even beckoned in the room,
and you leave again, so suddenly.

To not be glanced at in curiosity,
only when boredom hits,
you, so amicably feel the need to-
ask "how are you,"
"Merry Christmas,"
but I was never even on your wishlist.

I took your hand and felt my heart,
rattle inside of its cage.  
So suddenly.
Ready,
To pour you a cup of wine.
Have a drink,
things will be fine.

If I can just....
Stop
Feeling.

So suddenly, came.
These emotions,
and expectations.
Of a cup that's supposed to be filled.

I wanted to satiate
but instead,
I'm just a cup that wants to be held.

To lap up the attention,
in such a gentle cascade,
despite, desire, spiraling into my veins.

I want you to hold me,
like I'm your answer.

despite, being a cup of wine
that's filled with water.

Right now it's deceiving,
but I can't stop believing,
that so suddenly
thing's will get better.

Because for my new year's end,
and my new year's wish
is for my heart to stop hurting,
to put that cup back inside my chest.

And maybe then, when  I can heal
and when given a sign
I can pour my heart freely and ask

"Hey, would you like a glass of wine?"