I haven’t seen you or talked to you,
for years.

I froze when I saw you.

You were the first
that I truly loved
that I cared for the most
that I appreciated the most
& valued.

You were the first
that gave me a taste  of
what loving someone,
what appreciating someone
& valuing someone felt like.

But in the end,
you were the one
that made me feel worthless,
invisible & never enough.

Maybe I’m giving you too much credit.
Maybe I was delusional this whole time.
Maybe you weren’t the first
But you were the one
who impacted me the most.

You taught me how to love & hate
at the same time.