Be present, they said
But I am more gone than here
More Far then Near
I was not made for all of this
I'm sorry
But if I don't think about the future, then I'll be here forever
And if that hurts I'm sorry too
I would love you if I could and
I'd offer an explanation if I had one
But comfort is overrated and confusion suits you
I guess I'd just rather feel desired than wanted
I'm not flattered by gimme
Don't you dare need me because
That might wreck my mind
I can love you for the time
That it takes me to realize that we won't conquer the world and that's just fine
I'm not as cold I am
I promise I'm not
I love a lot
Maybe you need to be grandfathered in to intimacy
It's as good an explanation as any
Or maybe
My oxytocin maker's out of order
I think it's
The universe telling me not to tie myself up in the knots
Of another person's tangles
Because I was
Not
Made for this