I pull out a stool,
and I throw down a ten.
"A single shot whiskey,
and a single shot gin."

I drink them both down,
and cringe at the taste.
Out comes another ten,
and there's plenty to waste.

"Lets stick with the whiskey,
in a double shot glass."
It may take a while,
but the memories should pass.

I open my throat,
and invite the slow burn.
I sit down my glass,
as the room starts to turn.

I pull out a twenty,
and the bartender frowns.
Looking up and thinking twice,
before saying "slow down".

"One more double and a beer,
and i'll put it on cruise."
She pours them both slowly,
not the least bit amused.

"Your cruise doesn't work,
and we both know that's true."
I flash a fake smile,
just like I always do.

I find a small table,
in the back by itself.
I'm becoming a fixture,
like an old dusty shelf.

Memories of you,
and our little girl start to blur.
and my eyes start to water,
as my speech starts to slur.

The scars on my hands,
they drive me insane.
A constant reminder,
I couldn't save you from pain.

So i'll drink another double,
to erase my memory.
Of our little girls smile,
and our perfect family.

I don't want to forget you,
and it kills me to try.
But I still blame myself,
for the night you both died.

Twisted sheet metal,
is all that I see.
And I squeeze my eyes shut,
as these tears stream my cheeks.

What do you do,
when your mind kills your heart?
When your greatest memories,
are what's tearing it apart.

You are the loves of my life,
and my closest dear friends.
And I will love you forever,
until I see you again...