I've asked myself
while looking in my own eyes,
Who am I?
I can't untangle this mess
Of things I'm supposed to be
The things that make up "me"
I keep waiting for it to all make sense
For me to know what I'm doing
But the truth is,
I couldn't be more lost
Following a faint trail of what's supposed to be right
And I'm confused
But never asking for help
In fear I'd come off weak
And though the tears push at my eyes
Begging for me to let go
I hold them in and squeeze my hands tighter
Because I can only cry alone in the dark
I'm overruled by this overbearing feeling that
I have to morph myself into a lie
Hiding behind a phantom
Only a ghost of what I really am
What ever that is
I haven't figured it out
Maybe I never will
I can only hope that I will find the will
To go on when the lights go out