When I am older I will be just like my Nan,
Streaking my naked body every Wednesday to the delivery man.

I will have a chihuahua,
Drink my milk when its sour,

Use by dates will mean nothing,
For 10 year old bread makes a good stuffing,

I will live off many cups of tea
Every ten minutes have a ***.

Hoard a thousand tin of beans in the draw,
We all know we need them when we're at war,

I will be superstitious,
And make food taste delicious,

I would be head of my family, head of my herd,
My word will be final, anyone else's word is absurd,

Anyone who calls me 'dear',
will get a slap around the ear.

YES,
I want to be just like my Nan,
Every Wednesday streaking to the delivery man.