I was whole once. I knew who I was.
I was full of ideas and dreams, and surrounded by love.
I had a home, where we all stayed.
We built blanket forts, ran and played.

But that was all taken away, by someone
not quite a friend but in whom I loved anyway.
I was blindsided by  ruthless cunning,
and mercilessly betrayed.

My comforts were meaningless, heart and spirit broken,
my soul was lost. I was hurt and afraid.
I sank deep deep deep into a shallow grave,
tore my clothes in mourning. No god could save.

I had been beaten worse than I had ever imagined
Defeat hung 'round my head and drowned me in sadness.

All hope was finally crushed on a day I'll never forget
The day I devised a plan to finish what life I had left

I gathered the medication, tools for my doing in,
said goodbye to strangers that I called family and friends
moved into an old storage shed, and set out to put an end
to the misery, that had consumed all but my last breath

I took my charge without hesitation and in darkness I was swept
only to have an angel wake me from my bed
At dawns first light I arose from a nasty pool of red,
pills laid scattered, spewed about the whole mess

… And I was a new sort of alone, one I'd never felt

...In a way, I had    kind of left.

And for the first time in a while, I had nowhere to hide
I began to understand a little of what was going on inside

I soon after found a road
and began my life to roam

never to look back at how I was before
only the trail ahead, onward, f'ward.

I've lost myself so many times
To houses in cities, with girlfriends and wives

But I always seem again to find,
with hunger when I'm tired, in the rain when it's cold outside,

Myself again there, on the trail,
somewhere I can't hide