These are the moments
in the still night
I dread.
The overwhelming ones
where you have nothing
better to do than
think.
To remember over and over.
Dig into things you've seen.
Things you've heard.
To helplessly wonder and hope.
Try to lead yourself away from
disappointment.
You run scenarios through
your head.
Imagine conversations that will
never happen.
It leaves you feeling silly.
Knowing you're immersed in
a fantasy.
Even if it annoys you,
that you're lonely enough,
To indulge in these
wandering visions.
It gives a temporary idea.
Of what it would
be like.
If the one you want could be
with you.



*© NDHK