You have been offline for an entire day. You are kissing another girl, I just know it. You are caressing her soft hair, you are getting rid of her silk underwear, you are loving her on your bed, wrapped in the sheets that once covered our bodies. You are falling in love with her, no, you are already in love with her. You are going to abandon me.
My heart shrinks and I can't breathe. Why, why couldn't you love me? Why couldn't it be me? You are going to abandon me as soon as you turn on your phone. Maybe I should abandon you first, maybe I should disappear, maybe this way it would hurt less.
Then you are online again, you say "Henlo" with the "n" as you always do, and I'm waiting for you to tell me about the girl, that you are sorry, that you didn't mean to.
But you tell me your battery died and that you collapsed drunk on your friend's bed and that you miss me.
Suddenly, I can breathe again. You didn't abandon me. But that sneaky thought is still in the back of my head: you didn't abandon me yet. But you will.