pt. 1

she doesn’t have a favorite color
She’s said that different colors have different meanings
And linens are different than the lines
Alining the oceans face

She left a trace
On the nook of my chest
The hole in my stomach
The tip of my finger

I held her:
Velvet skin
Merlot tongue
Sleepy head

I said
“Don’t self-sabotage”
She laughed
And said
“Don’t change”
Her favorite thing about me is my optimism

She doesn’t trust herself
To trust me
So
she doesn’t trust me

i didn’t chose my words
Carefully enough
To keep her words
From catching in her throat
I wondered what she really
Wanted to say

Yesterday, i didn’t know who she was
Today i don't know her
She doesn’t believe in tomorrow




pt. 2.
She doesn’t have a favorite color
But she says she like blue for sheets
Black and White for cleats
Because color transcends being objectified

i find myself
Studying the history in
Her calloused hands
The language in her hips
The chemistry in her kiss

i held her:
Velvet touch
Merlot tongue
Sleepy head

I said “don’t self-sabotage”
And she let out a laugh
She said “don’t change”
her favorite thing about me is my optimism

I wondered what
Was on her mind
I could ask a million
And ten times in case a million and
Nine wasn’t enough the
First try
But as much as i
Studied the calculations
In her face,
I’m still bad at math

I wished on 11:11 that she might want me back