I'm soon to turn 30,
Yet one thing still easily slips my fingers,
I've read so many books,
I've watched so many tutorials,
I've blamed myself,
I've blamed others,
I've given up .

Then I get pull right back in.
The hope of fulfillment of a promise,
Achieving the desires in of my heart,
The longing I've buried so long,
The need that won't be ignored.

I get pulled right back in,
With a soul that seems mature,
A person that is loving, caring enough
To have me dreaming,
To have me hoping,
To revive my longing,
From the deep depths,
of my caged up heart.

The cycle then repeats,
Everything starts to fade,
My heart shrieks in pain,
I decide never again.
I give up on the dream.
I bury it all away,
Never to ache again ,
From a Love that I once thought would last.

In the meantime,
I need a drink.
Make it a red wine,
Something good for the heart finally.