a list of things to do "when it feels like the hands on your clock have arthritis"

1.  put on your diffuser, put in lavender essential oil, remember that this is what waiting for her smells like
2. go for a walk, but not where the two of you used to walk together, try not to think of how you two used to match your pace with every step
3. do not call her, call your best friend, do not think of how you would rather be calling her and ignoring the very people who are trying to support you
4. play music, but do not put it on shuffle, and do not think about how you would so much rather be listening to the playlist she made and then updated the day you started dating
5. write a poem, but ignore how every poem you write in the collection that has become your every day life still leads back to her
6. do not cry, you have already shed enough tears over someone who can ignore you
7. if you do start to cry, say it is because of your dad, or your work load, or because it is raining and you just have never really been able to enjoy the rain, do not admit that she has the strings to your heart and somehow you are still a puppet
8. make yourself a cup of tea, sit down, and let yourself feel, remember that even if it feels like the hands on the clock have arthritis, slow progress is still progress, you are whole and time will pass