after her i thought
maybe i am
a “real” lesbian
because when i was searching
for someone new
i kept finding myself
wanting to be
in a girls arms
but that is not because
i am a lesbian
it is because
through all of my searching
i still think
i was looking for her
so when i ended up
with a boys hand
tangled in mine
his lips pressed gently
and then not so gently
against mine
i knew that
i had been looking
for her
but now
i am just looking
for me