I don't know what to say. I cannot begin to fathom how you feel. How you must be feeling! But I Love you and in this moment I know that is nowhere near enough. You must want to punch a whole boxing ground down. I would! But I am beneath you. Your soul is more righteous. That is why my  love for you will never cease. I need you to know that.
Even this shall come to pass. This storm will calm. The ocean will flow in your rhythm again. I have no doubt. You are strong my wonder woman. More than anyone I know. All these pep talk is useless for now. But I hope you become one with your Chi again. But for now feel the pain. Let it pass through you until it transforms to healing. Remember this pain for when you have overcome. For when you are strong. Remember it because it is part of you.
I love you. I hope that someday you will read this and smile for what you have  conquered.
Yours
The Red_Head.