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Jul 2018
You've listened enough to know what to say
Your words cut deep as you fire your stored ammunition
I thought I was unveiling my soul and finally sharing myself completely
You were filing away the daggers you would later hurl back at me
Please don't leave me, it's you I beg

Your voice is rising, the insults growing more nasty with each octave
I search my mind for ways to fix all you say is wrong as my tears fall
You feel like you're settling, you can do so much better than me
I'm desperate to figure out what you need me to be and transform myself
Please don't leave me, I plead with you

You're making excuses, why do I make you hurt me like this, it's my fault
I try to remember what I said or did that pushed your buttons this time
You stand over me yelling for me to stop crying and hand me a napkin
It's then that I see the blood dripping on the bedspread and wipe my nose
Please don't leave me, my voice a whisper and you not even listening

You pack your bags to go as I beg and plead for you to stay
I know there's someone else and I say that it's ok, I'll say anything
You say you've had enough of me, crying, whining, making you feel bad
I say I'll change, I can't live without you, I'll love you better, I promise
Please don't leave me, I sob as the door closes in my face

You leave me with nothing but dried blood on the bedspread and tears
I wonder how I can go on without you and how I'll be able to breathe
Breathe, every breath so thick it sticks in my chest
I can't go on without you, no more breath, the razor slides across my skin
Please leave me, now it's my blood and my existence I'm speaking to

As the water in the tub turns from clear to crimson, it's his face I see
I start to sink down, it's then I begin to wonder if it was really all my fault
I hear his words, remember my tears, feel his fist, ******* blood
It wasn't me, I think this much too late and I need to stop it but I can't
Please don't leave me, it's me that I'm pleading with now, or maybe it's God

I realize as my conscious fades that I was not the problem
I deserved better and didn't see it, he cast such a large shadow I saw nothing but him
His words were the only truth I could hear, his actions all for my own good
How could love blind me so, how could I choose so quickly to go
Please don't leave me, my life is ebbing from my veins and my pleas are not answered, they are too late
Leisa Battaglia
Written by
Leisa Battaglia  44/F/Louisiana
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