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Nov 2012
The scene was utter madness the good long fell to the boring and bland ***** that now I write apon.
Old faces had long since been replaced by these like button zombies.
Hey commenting is hard I could hear them amoungsnt all the other voices in my head.

And here I thought everyone had a opinion just like a *******.
The zombies were at the door my trusty Pub the one true place i could talk **** about the sites owner without getting banned and taken out back while being tortured having to read the darksides blog for hours listening to Yanni and Justin Bieber.
Good lord man its like starbucks and twatter   had a ******* baby and called it Hello.

My fellow comrades had long since left for higher ground or the nut house really finger painting and graham crackers are so overrated.
Trust me I know cause i have alot of crazy friends who told me so.
Im kidding its cause im ******* nuts  just when im off my meds that is did anyone hear that?

The like zombies just kept pushing that ******* button.
I mean really if it was a free drinks or a ******* button id get it folks.
Hell id probaly have corpral tunnel by now  duh that would kick ***.

Comments had fallen to the evil zombie button of doom.
And no matter were I turned I couldnt get away from it.
This write has fifteen comments.
No the **** it doesnt there ******* likes yes much like ****** the **** was spreading faster than
clap in ******* not that id know.

I couldnt take it any longer moving at the breakneck speed of drunken hampster who cant stay in the wheel
I was off.
To the land of no return the offices of the website inwhich ive annoyed the ***** outta for way to many years
no not facebook  I only go there to read **** that no one could give a **** less about.

Tina just eat a steak mmmm.
******* fasinating Tina!

Taking a long walk okay drive cause walking really screws with my drinking.
I made my way through the land of no return no not Canada.
To the center  of mount who gives a *****.
It was there at the gates of the mighty lair of the dark lord I stood flask in side pocket
The doors opened and as i walked in the empty room I was met by a huge flat screen
hmm must be where the staff watches **** or animal planet thoose animals are
total freaks.

But enough with the foreplay children.

A face appeared apon the screen.
So I see you've finally shown Gonzo   how dare you enter the fortress of the dark lord.
Well ya know the dark lord really needs some security I mean really who the hell keeps there fortress next to a bed bath and beyond?

Look you crazy ******* the anger hampster said .
They have some really great stuff oils and canddles  why me and my other half love it.
Hey did you all meet on a trip in the mountians where you were herding sheep.
Dam you Broke Back Mountian now  my wife really wonders what im up to on my fishing trips.
Thanks for ruining it for all of us.

Well Gonzo you may have  found my hidden fortress but never will you leave.
Yeah I will.
You cant!
Oh Yes I can !
Oh no you wont!
Yeah I will!
We continued this argument for what seemed like ages then finally after a canadian popstars ***** finally dropped it ended.
Duh I do have a life after all people.
Yeah I know but ****** I could if i wanted to.

So just  how do you expect to leave my frotress of doom.
Duh ******* through the front door.
You cant its locked .
Hey like i cant get outta places i dont belong  look i got outta rehab  no no no.
Talk about a ****** party  its almost as bad as my spelling yeah sometimes jokes hurt.

But I do gotta ask lord ***** for brains how do ya get all thoose likes
I mean people used to comment there arses off even me sure i cant remember what i said
but hell i was under the influence I know shocking right?

Okay you drunken ******* I'll let you know witness my geinus!
With that the dark lords fishing buddy  pulled back a curtan to reveil  a room full of
cracked out cyber monkeys all sitting in front of like buttons .
With every push theyd get yet another hit of some sort of fruit duh like monkeys like drugs
yeah you think being they throw there **** around and all but really there just mean ******.

Mr pickles just did a thousand likes.
****** someone needs to stop the insanity.
The evil dark lord laughed like a sinister women does usally when i mention ***.
I swear no wonder I use esscorts im kidding there just regular hookers.

And now Gonzo I reveil to you your own like button.
There at a small desk with my name written apon the table in what couldnt be magic marker dam little monkeys
they love to write **** or with it at least hay whatever floats your boat or tree im just saying.

Mr pickels  pushed the button on my desk a little slot opened up
and a ice cold beer and wild turkey chaser appeared .
******* kick ***  I mean how terrible.

The dark lord slash ****** with a heart of gold laughed his sinister laugh the monkey jumped up and down and played with thenselves  while listening to there God Justin Bieber.

Was All hope lost?
Will Gonzo a infamouse party hampster be able to turn down a free drink?

Will the dark lord win in his battle to **** the site and raise the money for his *** change?
Will MR Pickels finally finish his novel titled No **** A Life story written in all organic ink.

Will Justin Bieber finally fly into the side of a mountain!

Tune in next time hampsters to the shocking finally  Gonzo And The Like Button Of Doom.

Yeah it really ***** when ya dont get a happy ending just ask John Travolta.

Till next time hampsters stay crazy
John Patrick Robbins Aka Gonzo
Written by
John Patrick Robbins Aka Gonzo  Shady Pines NC
(Shady Pines NC)   
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