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Apr 2018
Could you imagine a pain so deep down inside
That it can not be summarized in words you simply can write
A pain that touches your toes and up to the top of the ceiling
You can't eat, you can't sleep, that is the pain that I am feeling
But these different circumstances has got me feeling alone
All the doctors say you’re dead and gone
But it still feels like I could talk to you if I picked up the phone
You can't fix a broken window you just replace the pane.
But there is no pain great enough to replace your face
With my eyes matted shut from the tears that I slept on
I thank God for the pictures and your voice mails on my cell phone.
But please, while you are awed in the mist of the Lord
Don't forget all your friends and time spent on this world.
I will never have a friend like you ever again.
My heart is a vault now, I'm scared to let people in.
No matter how many oceans or rivers I cry
My heart will never let you go, I'll never say good bye.
A lot of my hours are now spent in the place where you lay
As I sit crying, wondering, who would you be today
If you undersrand I’m sorry. Stay strong friend.

In 9 days it’s one year since you took your life. And in 11 days is when I felt so guilty I tried to take mine.

I miss you Calen. Last night was hard. I had another attack and I needed you. I love you.
Kelsey Rhoads
Written by
Kelsey Rhoads  18/F/The dark place of my mind
(18/F/The dark place of my mind)   
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       mia, Charlie Black, Bleurose, ---, Lorenzo Neltje and 9 others
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