Feb 13
Sometimes i feel like my life is controlled by a substance so powerful that if i tried to fight it, it would be like tying a rope around my neck and pulling it until i collapse onto the ground. Have you ever felt as if your life isn’t yours? Well, that’s how i feel 99% of the time. I feel like I’m living for someone else but not myself. I wake myself up for someone else every morning just to walk into someone else’s building to sit at someone’s else’s computer and type someone else’s words. My life isn’t really mine. Don’t get me wrong, the words I’m typing now is my words but maybe that’s why they’re so inappropriate. Maybe my words are so inappropriate that there’s no way i could ever type my own words. I need help but i wouldn’t dare ask for it. I feel alone surrounded by hundreds of people. Is that normal? Is it normal to feel alone whenever I’m out with my friends? Maybe i should try to fight this substance. They will call it suicide but I’ll call it death on arrival because i didnt choose to come into this world and i didn’t choose to leave it. Someone else chose it for me. Someone else will say that i had a lot of issues but what someone else doesn’t know is that someone else is the cause of my issues. Someone else said that I could never survive someone else’s world but what if i never had a chance at surviving either. Someone else had a good chance at surviving but blew someone else’s brain onto the concrete just so someone else would take them out of this world. Someone else cried when someone else left but would someone else cry if i leave? Would someone else come to my rescue because someone else promised me they would save me?
ashtonbrehite
Written by
ashtonbrehite  21/F
(21/F)   
  112
   Lior Gavra
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