Fate not good at humor thing,
Smile of mine looks like a grin-
What am I? Why did I happen?
What did I do wrong?

Wish of death from inner voice
This is ever be my choice?
All that I can do now
Is to sing my songs

My 'gold' eternity: endless fear,
The pain of memories that disappear
Finites fail at trying to warn me
But I'm not lonely here.

Wisdom finite? Little child?
Away from me, separate miles,
Avoid contact with these hands
Can take you to the Spirit Realm.

We can live in Cyanide Castle
World of pains and of much tassels
I cannot trust me
Is my life a lie?

They say I'm so-called "smarter" than my peers,
Very wise, compared to those my years,
I'm afraid I know too much fear
I'm forced to keep me quiet

Landed in a trap, falling forever
I don't know what I am and what did I do wrong?
But someway, I swear, I'll put me back together
But all I can do for now is to sing my lament songs.

Really want me to be a kind of silence
My ways to ahieve can be very self-violence
No one hears me
I don't need 'reality'
Find comfort in this "stage."

All that you see
These poems, they're my autobibliographies
Sometimes temporary change.

Telling you my many stories
Don't know why but I'm really sorry
Rules dictates me that I shouldn't
Raise a riot

They just won't let me go
Your tears, don't cry, think on my "shows"
I'm afraid I know too much, I fear
I'm forced to keep me quiet


Please?
Don't hold it against me,
I don't want to scar your judgement
We don't know all that I've been through?