dear M,

it's hard to imagine really
or maybe
it's not hard at all

all the signs were there

the green enveloping your eyes
losing its breathless light
when you mentioned me

the way you used to say my name
like it was something precious
like it was yours to guard
like it was a secret only known to us
(and later, your voice losing its melody,
like it was just another noun in your vocabulary)

stranger

the way your lips no longer
sought my skin
"she's just tired", i'd think
(but oh, how i longed to feel the pressure of your tongue,
the soft kisses along my neglected neck,
your wandering hands on me, inside me, consuming me)

but then there it was:
the heartbreaking true
the undeniable reality
that your soul, once intertwined with mine,
was slowly but surely wanting to be free

and it hurt
it hurt because we were one
you and i,
here, now, in a past life, in a future life
always
(but then again, maybe not)

it was the first time i've felt robbed
like a part of me was no longer with me
because it was never mine to begin with
it was yours
yours all along, just waiting to be claimed

i will never be the same

(and maybe that's okay).