I think the problem with me is that I expect so much from so little. I try to force things that I want to last knowing that it's not going to work. I try to mend things that don't need to be mended. I think with my mind rather than my heart. I'm aware of when I'm doing something wrong but in the heat of the moment persuaded that it's okay. I try to fix things that I purposely tried to break. I try to trigger emotions out of people when my mind feels insecure. Then try to play victim by using quotes that right my wrongs. I know what I'm doing. It has became a habit over time. Now I don't know how to stop but I want to. My confused feelings are consuming my mind. I do temporary stuff that ruins something that could've lasted for a lifetime. & now it's too late. I always think. "Hurt them before they hurt you." But majority of the time, they're not wanting to hurt me.
This poem is a poem I wrote May 31,2017 and I am just now posting it. I lost the motivation to continue to write but hopefully this brings my passion back.