I could tell you the exact day I became complacent I can recall the way he parted his hair and the way he touched a steering wheel and the color of his eyes And how he cared enough about me to make sure I didn't drink and drive But not enough to stop mixing my drinks all night And since I can't stand up for myself, he watched as I fell apart I am a marionette with a broken string but ****, he's a master in the art Constantly moving me; bending my frame and pulling my wires And keeping me onstage whenever he desires But it's hard for me to play my part and keep up with my lines When I come home smelling like a different cologne each night When I am just an empty canister they keep bringing to their lips Begging and pleading me to offer them something with purpose
But it's always the same story: They fabricate me I break and I bleed under their idea of self discovery And my selfish idea of recovery Out of every sweet name or ***** word they've ever called me I think I've found that "Lonely" is my favorite thing to be
I haven't lit a cigarette in weeks, but tonight I'll light three; One for him, one for me, and one for the person I swore I would never be
Listen; My biggest flaw is that when I settled for feeling comfortable, When I settled for what he told me I was I never even bothered learning self-love