(Try to imagine Donald Trump on a stage in a tuxedo with a top hat and a cane.)*
(1) "I've spent many years On a stage of sorts. Including all the times I've spent in the courts. But now I'm on the biggest And grandest stage of all And on a constant high, Though not from alcohol. Since being president Is not an easy task, To help me run this country, There's ONE thing that I ask:
"Please… Can… You… Give me a break? Come on and Give me a break. They say to take it on the chin, But hey! I never thought I'd win. So give me a break. Yes, give me a break. For Pete's sake Give me a break!
(2) "People say they want To see my tax returns. Every time I hear that, Oh, my stomach churns. Buh-lieve me: no one's being Taken for a ride. But my financial matters Are…um…classified. There was no collusion With Putin. Can't you see? We JUST exploited his Dislike for Hillary.
"So… Come… On… Give me a break-- A beautiful break! I will fix this world. And how! You know I'm the cat's meow. Just give me a break. Yes, give me a break. For goodness' sake Give me a break!
(3) "If Congress pats my back, I'll give theirs a pat. If Dems did, too, then I Would hug a Democrat. Loyalty’s important, So if I get the urge, I might just have to give The FBI a purge. I wish the prying media Would try to be my friend And write what pleases me. Of course that would depend.
"If… They… Would… Give me a break-- A big giant break! I've the right to ridicule Anyone I think a fool. So give me a break. Yes, give me a break. For God's sake Give me a break!
(4) "So what if Flynn's a liar And Spicer is a **** And Bannon is a racist And Sessions is a rube? Ivanka and Trump Junior Will pick up any slack. I've got Kelly whipped, And Sarah has my back. I even have the white Supremacists at my feet. To stir up all my base, All I do is tweet.
"ONE… MORE… TIME… Give me a break-- A fabulous break. Kim Jong Un has got to go. Call me Mr. Dynamo! Just give me a break-- A HUGE, gorgeous break. Come on! Just Give me a break!"