Sun has fallen
behind darken clouds.
Replaced with grey sphere,
releasing bolts that cut like knife.

Heart bleeds in river waves of sadness,
feeling tides of loneliness.
Feeling abandoned
and stripped of self worth.

How could my own family turn on me?
Leave me when harm I never aimed toward them.
How can they not see the gifts I possess?
Why would they desert me,
making me feel like a vacuous kin
jailed with invisible bars of their judgments?

I lie in a bed aching for closure.
I try swimming but thoughts keep coming
weighing me down.
I pray asking God why I was left so alone.

New Year bells are ready to be rung,
as hopes for a better year are echoed in heart
between pain of separation that lingers.

The silence is deafening,
as minutes drag like hours.
As anger adds to feelings causing storms behind eyes.

Until slowly ears perk from whisper saying,
find your own power
and transmute all feelings to love.  

Until healing takes place
to feel God within
knowing inside self divinity lives
even though others will never see.

Until breath carries and wisdom comes
ushering in sun once again.
Again, to live my life fearlessly
as my own friend.