I was having a bad day, thinking about my past & future
Thinking about my talent not taking me anywhere, still end up being a loser
I came home from work, took a shower, then started listening to music
I grabbed a bottle of ***** with a hand full of pills contemplating something stupid
Only thing on my mind at the time was either going missing or dying
And the one person I reached out to for advice wasn’t replying
Few hours roll by but I still haven’t made a decision
Just waiting for the depression & anger to make a collision
Almost to the bottle of the bottle with 5 pills in my system
Listening to the voices in my head & their evil filled wisdom
I get up from my bed, walked to the bathroom, & stared into the mirror
Seeing the hell on both shoulders, the message is becoming clearer
Pills aren’t doing any justice, I’m just turning into a zombie
Washing my sorrows down my throat with this dark cloud above me
It’s now 3am & I’m on the floor with a butcher’s knife in my hand
Holding it next to my neck feeling like the world will never understand
How I can feel so alone sometimes or feel unappreciated
Trying to do right but all I’ve ever felt was hatred
I placed the knife on my wrist then began to cut just a bit
Still following the voices in my head telling me I’ll never be ****
Move the knife slowly right before they tell me don’t quit
Oops there it goes, a little bit of blood dripping from my wrist
If that was so easy, let me aim at my throat again
“Do it Dre, this world is better off without you. Face it, you won’t win.”
Supplying pressure but still no movement to cut
All the motivation to die when I look at myself feeling such disgust
Right before I proceed to slash myself, I then receive a message
Showing me the love I’ve been ignoring & how I’m a blessing
I wipe the tears from my eyes, stand up, & realize how selfish I became
Trying to **** myself over a group of people who don’t even care to know my name
“Dre, you’re an amazing gift to those without a voice”
“If you leave, who else is gonna be the perfect versatile voice”
“You gotta chance here to do something bigger than your wildest dreams”
“So I encourage you to stand up, dust yourself off, & chase your dreams”
I look at myself in the mirror once more, told the Devil he can’t have me
Proceeded to the toilet & threw up all the pills used trying to drag me
“I’ll no longer give the enemy any power over me, I will have self control”
“I will be Great at what I do by any means. I shall not end this road”
Drop my knees & told God that I’m eternally grateful
And no more shall I continue to please the ungrateful
Thank you for turning me around from the wrong direction I was headed
And thank you for always keeping my soul protected