is it ok
if i cry for you

just a little bit longer?

i keep saying that
this time
is the last
cry

but then another
thought comes
another memory
arises

and i can see your face in
the changing light
so calm
so relaxed
so beautiful

i hear your voice
in my mind
and my lip
starts to quiver

i'm sorry i am
who i am
and for whatever
i have done

i didn't even mean
to find you

i wish i didn't know
about you

sometimes
it's better not to know
and not to love.

so please,
can i just cry a little more?

because right now
i imagine that
in my last days
when
i am old and
ugly and
everyone has died

i will be alone
and remembering
the nights with you

and that thought,
i cannot bear.
not now and
not tomorrow.

i just need to
cry for you
one last time.
(ad infinitum)