in 2013, a few months after I was released from a long term treatment facility that tried to heal my depression, my want to die, I met a boy. His name was Zach, and we fell in love. We didn't fall sexually in love, but we fell into a slow progression of an understatement for one other. We became connected spiritually. However, after a few years, our love for one another faded. He wrote me a love letter in 2014, sprayed it with perfume and colored the paper in water colors. That was around the time we stopped talking. Now, years and years later, he's gone. Like a ghost of a dead person. All of his social media is gone. I don't know whether or not he is still breathing . It hurts terribly not to know, though. I should've kept him closer. I regret the loss of him more than almost anything.