Aug 2017
When things like this come up,
I often wonder if I'm good enough.
I'll feel cold as I remember it all
then super weak remembering the fall.
I tried my hardest to forget,
I had thought denial was my best friend.
Just when I think I've made peace with it,
everything comes crashing back to me...
I hate these heated months.
Not only because of the bugs,
and the weather that brings so much sweat
but because of the nightmares that come with them.
I often wonder if I'm good enough.
I'll feel cold as I remember it all
then super weak remembering the fall.
I tried my hardest to forget,
I had thought denial was my best friend.
Just when I think I've made peace with it,
everything comes crashing back to me...
I hate these heated months.
Not only because of the bugs,
and the weather that brings so much sweat
but because of the nightmares that come with them.
I don't just remember what happened, I remember everything it caused me to do.
I remember how I felt like I wasn't good enough for anyone else or good enough to stick around. I feel like I need to take two hundred showers and not go out. But I'm doing my best to look around, I don't have to be afraid, he's not around.
I remember how I felt like I wasn't good enough for anyone else or good enough to stick around. I feel like I need to take two hundred showers and not go out. But I'm doing my best to look around, I don't have to be afraid, he's not around.
