There was an amazing dog that could amazingly read books. I wanted to meet this dog. I drove 1,600 miles as fast as I could. I killed several people. Finally I arrived at the dog's house. "May I please see the dog that can read books?" "He's over there," the dog's owner said. "Where?" "See that shredded paper? Follow the shredded paper!" There were many cubic yards of shredded book pages. I broke into a trot. I had arrived. There he was: THE DOG! The dog was tearing up a large book. "Hey mister! Your dog's tearing up that book. Why's he doing that?" "What a dumb-*** question!" The dog's owner sniped. "He always tears up books after he's read them!" "Oh, yes of course," I said as if that was the most logical thing that I had ever heard in all my life.