Hearing you moan about the baby weight While warming up the Cow and Gate Droopy tum and ***** ****** dry And how they leak at every cry Your body will never be the same Ever since the baby came Constantly exhausted beyond all belief When they finally sleep through, dear God, the relief Training and tantrums, toddlers are trying You learn to accept they never stop crying Oh to be one of those wretched souls! Sterilising bottles and benches and bowls Gaining those precious protective pounds Awakening to those unmistakable sounds Washing and folding and wiping and feeding All the work that comes with breeding And now the sun sets on that part of my life Never a mother, only a wife For all those hopes that didn't make it Bun in the oven but unable to bake it Trying not to envy and regret and hate But I just can't shift the baby wait...