I understand the appeal
Right around now I could almost go for it

After dad died, we swore we would never drink or do drugs or anything like that
We didn't get the people who did, but I understand now
How the same day-after-day can drive you crazy
How I don't want to know myself right now
Hell, I want to lose every piece of who I am, I don't want to be aware or in control
I want to be gone

Let go

I understand the lengths people will go to run away from this world
But I cannot succumb
No, instead I will paint with all the buckets of misery and infinity I can find and turn my world into rainbows
As far as my eyes can reach, poetry as often as my lips can speak
I will survive

In closing, what I've really been trying to say is just this message to myself:
*Please stop telling me I want to die