Feb 2017
where have I been?
an alternate world
there but not here
here but not here
trying to make order of the chaos in my head...to control my heart’s erratic beat
sweating through replays
struggling with what if
seeking the reason why...but coming up empty ..except for self loathing for the lack of clarity
whirling around in a life ******* spiral of confusion and pain
emotionally and spiritually wrecked
I have nothing left to fight with
I am done being sick
#thisjourneyofdays
an alternate world
there but not here
here but not here
trying to make order of the chaos in my head...to control my heart’s erratic beat
sweating through replays
struggling with what if
seeking the reason why...but coming up empty ..except for self loathing for the lack of clarity
whirling around in a life ******* spiral of confusion and pain
emotionally and spiritually wrecked
I have nothing left to fight with
I am done being sick
#thisjourneyofdays
Written as part of a series - The Meditations #1 - #11, over three days at a silent spiritual retreat. more healing took place in three silent days that in three years of therapy. Go figure! Not there yet but it is a more productive work in progress. #thisjourneyofdays
