written  November 15th, 2016

"Sometimes I envy those who lie vacant in space, composed of Stardust, creating energies so naturally and effortlessly

Sometimes I envy the amount of beauty they shed on to this earth

Sometimes I envy them - because they knew their potential was to be used outside of what lies before our blinded eyes

And they knew that what they once saw, adjacent to our own vision - wasn't good enough

Sometimes I envy the quick and easy relief they felt

When they overflowed their lungs with water, took a metal handle to their head, or sat in their car for one last nap

Closed their eyes, inhaled, and accepted that they were too great for this world to handle

Sometimes I envy that they no longer feel the stress of societies standards

Sometimes I wish I had the confidence to do as they had done to themselves

And sometimes I wish I also slipped away into the vast abyss"