A house painted in white, the colour of peace
Autumn covers its frontyard in leaves
The masses gather and scream
A crackling voice betrays seething beliefs.

It's a lie waiting to be sold to the highest bidder
Honey, everything will get better if we add some glitter
Warning signs covered with election posters
A popularity contest, let's introduce the imposters.

I'm a special kind of candidate
For decades, I've endured all your hate
And those you despise, I know them all by name
But will they ever listen to what I'm saying?

I'm a self-made man just taking care of business
And since I've made it, every day is Christmas
Push their bodies off the pier, this is just a modern witch test
And if the weights make them drown, at least they're gonna ***** less.

This car without breaks is gaining traction
Let's ask the Romans how to stop a chain reaction
Both sides scream
People to the ballots, cast your vote for our very last bastion.
A waste of paper, an American election.