I looked into the mirror just now
Before I turned all the lights off
The Campbell House
On Campbell Avenue
In all its drama, and all its tension
Watches Netflix
Reads. Writes.
We lay our heads down
Instagram a pic or two
Letting go of today.

Women in rooms.
Women undergoing such experiences
I went shopping with girlfriends today
And wasn't present at all.

When I glanced in the mirror
I saw the new chain around my neck
With a stone that spoke to me at the store
But perhaps might be fake
But its beautiful.
A soft green, gold
Dangerous. Beautiful.
Like me.

I glanced in the mirror
No make up, a line that just cut through my throat
As I remember that was the title of
The portfolio of poetry
I tucked pieces of my heart away into
And you read it page to page
Shared it with strangers
Trying to engulf my every crevice
I just didn't know you.

I was excited
About the call and response
You did say all the right things
You walked in with such swagger
Strength
Small and light
Strong, playful
And you wanted me
Oh how you wanted
me
And thats how I became your prisoner for the next year of my life.

But.
I looked into the mirror just now
My lips formed an expression
Of just acceptance
Slight acceptance
I guess
Really
Its not all that surprising.

Soon.
Things will all change
So soon.
Dear God
Please let it be for the better.

When others speak profound things to me
I keep quiet because I want to drink up every word.

You're not invited
And its funny to think
A chocolate heart shaped cake
I covered it in walnuts
I bought you whiskey glasses
And I'm at that point now
Where all the yous blend together
In one heaping puddle of ****
Representing a past
A past of lies, deceit, abandonment
And I leap over that ******* pond

With bare Alabama feet.