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Mar 2016
I stopped by your place once more
You weren't there
But I knew it was
Probably for the best.

Empty walls
Filed away into closed up boxes
Each propped against the other
Holding each other up
Tearing me down.

I opened your door
And a heaviness pooled out.
It seeped out of the cushions
On that couch that we laid on
Together while you
Nuzzled my cheek.

And it wafted from the incense
That you lit when you told me
That you loved me
And you
Offered me a kiss.

That feeling of emptiness
That you once filled with that
Look in your eyes and that
Willingness to hold me
Is now vacant
Once again.

Just like this little basement apartment
That you never meant to call forever
But I thought of you as just that
Within this space.

It's haunting
And heartbreaking
And all life moves in
Slow motion
And I want to be rid of it
And I want to run from here.

But I cannot pick my feet up
As I think of all the memories
All the unyielding
True affection
That came out of me
In this place.

I build up the kind of courage
That it takes to turn my knees around
And catch them just in time
As they fall weak.

And back inside my mind
I'm crying
And I'm mourning
That you're leaving
But on the outside of my body
I'm walking out of here.

And back inside my mind I'm running
And I'm catching up your fingers
As I pull you back into me
And I keep you
Here.
Together.

But on the outside
I'm walking calmly
Back to my car with my possessions
That I came to this empty place
To pick up
Years and moments ago.

And in my mind.
I end up with you.
And never would you leave me.

And in my mind.
We'd always been this way
Together.

And in my mind.
You didn't leave.
I can't do this anymore.
rootsbudsflowers
Written by
rootsbudsflowers  23/F
(23/F)   
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