I hate to break this to you
But I've got some awful news
Seems our parents as we grew up
Weren't telling us the truth

Life is not the party
The older that you get
Adulthood's gonna **** ya
If it hasn't already yet

Never once was mentioned the fall out
Starting with the hair and teeth
I'm not sure they even would have told us
If they hadn't first lost their memory

Or that the ache
When you first awake
Will be the best
That you feel all day

And what the taxman doesn't take
The undertaker will
That is if you have anything left
After a lifetime of paying bills

Yes, never did they tell us
As we were quickly on our way
That we'd live every waking moment
With some sort of stabbing pain

Or that if and when we make it to the end
We'd lose all our self respect
Having strangers bathe and change us
In our state of drooling mess

I'm sure they thought it funny
Those wild old crazy coots
Keeping age a secret
And us out of the loop

Not sure I could ever forgive them
For all the lying that they did
I guess the only option is
Not to tell our kids...