i had a dream
i sat in a puddle of insecurities
that grew
everytime i lifted my phone
to check the front camera
"am i pretty yet?"
no
stop checking
you look exactly how you did
twenty minutes ago
except
your nose is a little oily now

i cried
at the ankles of a man i didnt know
"why will no one love me"
and he looked at the sky
and told me not to be silly
he told me no surgeon could fix
the trainwreck that happened
in 1999
and no one cares enough
to mourn it anymore

i need glasses
but my squinted eyes widen
at the realization...
THATS WHY NO ONE SEES
WHAT I SEE
my watermelon personality
drips onto the wounds of others
like lemon juice
where the **** is everyone going
i'd love to stay and chat
but my past tells me
that you're a waste of a heartbreak
im tired but i rather stay awake
because my dreams have seemed to be
the scariest horror film