I'm tired of me looking at myself and hating what I see.
I'm tired of crying when no one is around.
I'm tired of waiting for that one person to see that I'm hurting.
I'm tired of hoping, praying, screaming that someone could hear me.
It's like I'm in this big white box that has enslaved me.
Unable to see if anyone is looking at me or crying for me.
Unable to hear my screaming cries that ties me to this...cold and damp earth.
This earth filled with people dying, crying trying! trying so hard to fly away from all this.
I'm tired of pretending everything is going to be alright.
I'm tired of lying to myself, hiding, tying to fight my own mind.
Striving trying to laugh at those small but big things that are cutting me down, and tying me to this chair beating me.
All those colors I used to see in that big wide open space is gone.
Those stars bring me deep into my mind were I'm lost and wounded.
I'm tired of hurting.
Seeing anyone else hurt with me like this.
I break for them.
I can't do anything about it.
So I'm here writing this down, siting on my small bed and trying to block out this world.
Crying to myself.
Writing again and again and again.
Is that really all I can do?
I'm painting myself a picture of how I wish everything was.
And it's draining.
I'm failing.