Should I mourn for you?
If you're not really gone, that is.
I give thoughts of you enough of me as it is, it takes
A lot of energy to remember you like this, it
Takes a lot of my time away, frankly.
I could be weightless -
Lifted by flowers, yes, that light,
That unburdened, I could
Make no noise at all walking
Over dried leaves and branches, yes,
I could be that relieved.
I feel that this staying power the winter has is
My fault, my doing from these
Recurring cold thoughts, I make it
Snow in my own garden,
Having to dust off all my plants and fruits and
Regrow and regrow after my own
Bad weather disrupts things.
I could be barefoot looking for shells and glass to
Use to build my nest, could be
Learning the quiet language of snails, to know
Why they leave their trails, could be
Getting golden from the sun -
Knots come undone,
Letting you go in increments of weight -
Can't all at once or I'll float away,
Just slow enough to learn to walk again.