Jan 2015
So many scars I thought.
“***** me, *****, ***** ******* me”
“Don’t do it I” I pleaded.
Cut, scratch, scrape the flesh
“Bleed you *******, bleed!
It doesn't hurt, it helps.
Not normal, what the ***** normal
You can’t destroy something that’s
That’s already destroyed.”
(He shouts at me)
“Look at me! Go on; tell me I’m not already broken.”
Empty eyes, reflecting nothing.
Inward staring; shutting me out .
He looked up at me with an air of indifference
Then handed me the blade.
So many scars I thought; so many nightmares.
“***** me, *****, ***** ******* me”
“Don’t do it I” I pleaded.
Cut, scratch, scrape the flesh
“Bleed you *******, bleed!
It doesn't hurt, it helps.
Not normal, what the ***** normal
You can’t destroy something that’s
That’s already destroyed.”
(He shouts at me)
“Look at me! Go on; tell me I’m not already broken.”
Empty eyes, reflecting nothing.
Inward staring; shutting me out .
He looked up at me with an air of indifference
Then handed me the blade.
So many scars I thought; so many nightmares.
I spent fifteen years working as a prison officer at HMP Doncaster.
This was the first self harm i witnessed. sadly over the years i saw much more.
This was the first self harm i witnessed. sadly over the years i saw much more.
