Joseph,

These past 3 years I have been seeing you and talking to you about the difficulties with my parents and being happy with myself. I told you about how I am not happy at college and I am trying to transfer schools. But I had some time to myself today and I realized that it’s not this school that I am unhappy with it is myself. I love being alone; spending time watching Netflix or just roaming around to new places, but then I become lonely. I do not know how to fully interact with others and that scares the **** out of me. I try to be myself but there’s this massive wall with which only alcohol can put a crack in that others can reach me to. Kate is the only one who has put the biggest crack as if she can poke her eye through the hole to see me, but I keep patching up each crack the best I can. I don’t know how to let others in and I don’t know if I want people to reach me. I feel like I need to go away for a while to a place where others feel the same as I do. I try to think of places to go to where I can find myself but I keep thinking of staying in hospitals because the only other people that feel this way are ******* crazy.
I don’t feel like I’m insane but I need help.

Best regards,
Kristen