I just want to be happy. I have countless reasons to be happy. But in the end it's just me every **** night, every ******* night, alone. And empty. And I hate myself. I hate myself with every atom of my being. And I hate myself for hating myself. I'm playing with needles. That's not really a metaphor. I'm just watching droplets form on my skin. Because I doubt the plausibility of my own happiness. And I've always loved body art.
Please stop doing this to me. I'm clearly not stable enough to handle these games, so can't we stop playing them?